It's J Week and That's No Joke

On the way home from picking my kids up from school earlier this week we were stuck in traffic during some construction. One of the orange clad men on the site noticed my son and approached the car. He indicated that he wanted us to roll down the window. At first blush this seemed a bit odd with the the potential to be creepy. But he was a older gentleman (and as I age, the definition of “older” changes with some regularity) and my gut feeling was that he was not ill intended. Besides, we were surrounded by cars and construction workers so it seemed safe enough.

I rolled down the window and he pointed at my son and said “What has two knees and swims in the ocean?” The traffic started to move and we needed to pull away. The pressure was too much and we both responded that we didn't know. “A tunee fish” the man replied as we drove off.

We laughed, not really because it was funny, but at the surprise and joy of a stranger approaching us for the sole reason of telling a joke. And all at once it occurred to me; being  kindness in the week of J we must tell him a joke right back! Because this particular road construction project had been going on for some time (laying of sewer pipes for those interested in details) there was a good chance we would have the opportunity later in the week.

We prepared. What happened to duck who flew upside down? He had a quack up. We planned. The next time we saw the man, I would slow the car, my son would roll down the window and tell the joke.

Alas, by end of the week the opportunity eluded us. By the time we came home from school each afternoon the construction was shut down for the day. And the week of J concluded without us completing our task. But as we move onto K week, my son has vowed to accomplish his mission. The joke will be told at the first opportunity regardless of what letter is featured.

A Little Joy in June?

So, I was driving from my regular eye check up with dilated eyes and sunglasses, of course, and listening to the radio.  My plan was to return home directly in order to prepare for and get to work.  Like I said, the radio was on, NPR, to be precise.  The local news stated that the fire stations of Massachusetts were collecting donations for the people of the Springfield area who were so badly effected by the unusual and damaging F3 tornado.  They especially needed tarps, bungee cords and bottled water.  Immediately I thought of Betsy's many Kindness of Strangers posts in which she spoke about the importance of acting promptly, without procrastination, when a thought of kindness occurs.  I knew who sells water, tarps and bungee cords.  And, in fact, it's a store whose name has a J right in it - our local Job Lot.  So, I made my purchases (with sunglasses on inside the store).  In addition to the above mentioned items I also chose to purchase a gift card.  The woman who was checking out was about to bag the card.  I asked, kindly, I trust, if she could leave it out.  We bagged up the rest of the items.  I paid and then pushed the card back towards her on the counter, leaned forward and said, "Can you please take this and give it to a person you feel may need it?"  She looked at me as though I had several heads.  Well, I was wearing sunglasses inside, and then she smiled quizzically.  I pushed it a little closer to where her hands were and added -  that it is a bit random but "I'm hoping it will be a bit of kindness for someone."  She smiled again, this time less quizzically and tucked it next to her register.

The tarps, water and bungee cords were dropped off at a Massachusetts fire station not too far from where I was.  The reception man behind the "Communications" window at the safety complex said, "I'll get you a firefighter," when I explained I had a small donation to make and was it true they were collecting for Springfield.  I laughed at that phrasing, and then thanked the young man who helped me transfer the goods from my car to the station.  He explained that two firefighters from that station had gone to Springfield that morning for work detail.

While I don't consider tarps, bungee cords and bottled water to imply joy, nor is the reason for the donation related to anything but recovering from great difficulties.  I do imagine that feeling recovered will lead to joy.  It's going to be a long road for some that will require tools to get them there.  Tarps, bungee cords and the like.  It is the juxtaposition of the green and blue coverings with white, blue and yellow cords with what they will lead to -- a full recovery, I hope, that lead me to yesterday's deeds.  And I did experience joy in my exchanges with the woman at Job Lot, and with those at the Safety complex.  My good fortune among many, in June.

Wishing all you readers bits of Joy in June!

Inspired by the Isle of Iona

Indeed, last year I traveled to a remote Isle off the coast of the Highlands of Scotland.  It is called Iona.  Back when Betsy asked me to participate in this Kindness adventure with her I sat down, pulled out my pen and paper and went through the alphabet just to see what came to mind for each letter.  For the record I've veered away from initial ideas at least a couple times thus far.  But for the letter "I" I've been unable to move away from Iona though I was not clear how my experiences there would lead to an Act of Kindness towards a stranger here until today.

Today I've identified an organization which provides scholarships for the thorough and professional training of sign language interpreters for those who are deaf or hard of hearing.  How does this connect to Iona?  Well, I traveled abroad with my very good friend from the Midwest whom I've known since we shared our graduate school experience.  She is deaf.  We were traveling with a group of hearing people.  She and I knew only three people in our group.  I know some sign language and no one else knew sign.  We lived on the Isle of Iona in the Abby and experienced the amazing hospitality of the Iona Community.  The experience was enhanced for my friend and me because of the intensity associated with me attempting to sign or write for her all that was being experienced through my ears -- the airport announcements for our flights, the information given on our Scottish ferry rides including when they changed the spoken word from English to Gaelic, the sounds of bleating sheep and lambs, and warbling puffins, historical information about Glasgow on our coach tour, translating lyrics to music sung ("You take the High Road and I'll take the Low Road...") and so much more.

The magical inspiration for this blog was how a Scottish woman, a leader in the Iona Community, extended herself throughout the week in countless ways to incorporate my dear friend into all that was happening, into all communications, formal or informal, planned or impromptu.  This woman knew no sign language.  She had a rich Scottish accent which prevented my friend from lip reading, yet through the week, the relationship which evolved between my friend and her served to shrink the gap between the hearing world which dominated and my friend's world.  It served to demonstrate the importance of being aware of those around us and what each of us can do to shrink differences enough to allow for learning and growth through exchange with one another, no matter how challenging.

Before, during and after being on Iona I wondered what my friend's experience would have been if I was actually an interpreter or if there were interpreter services available to us for the trip.  This morning it came to me -- my idea to contribute to a national organization dedicated to promoting the professional standards and to educating sign language interpreters for people who are deaf or hard of hearing.  I figure if I can contribute to a scholarship fund then I am supporting, in a small way, the notion that all people deserve an equal opportunity to participate in "listening" and communicating whether hearing or not.

Imagine being on a remote island in another country and having no one with whom you could communicate with ease.  Just imagine.


ADDENDUM:
Incidentally, on my morning stroll (6/3/11) I met up with my neighbor and learned that a serious act of kindness was committed last week by lawn mowers!  See  Helpin' and Hollerin' from last week's H entries.  Unbeknownst to my neighbors some other kind soul decided that it would be kind to shorten their grass.  By the way, the other kind folk did a better job than I would have as they took a rake to the mowed grass.  Nice work!

I Scream, You Scream

We all scream for ice cream. And I almost screamed when I saw how much it cost.

A natural for kindness in the week of “I” was ice cream. It's the beginning of summer, the weather is finally warm and the ice cream stand we pass on the way home from my kids school has been open for over a month. It it is one of those places designed to get the attention of children driving by. Painted in bright colors and decorated like a pirates ship, this place makes kids beg to stop. And my younger son is no different. He had asked already several times this spring but my husband  refused because he claimed it was too expensive. Today I picked up the boys from school and temporarily won favored parent status when I announced we would stop for ice cream.

As we stood reviewing the choices (of which there were a zillion) I was reveling in my boys' happiness. Until I saw the prices. Holy mackerel! I could have bought several gallons for what it was going to cost me. I did keep my surprise to myself and resisted the urge to drag the kids back into the car. They placed their orders and I, giving in to the moment, ordered a scoop too. And in honor of the kindness of “I” I bought a five dollar gift certificate and instructed the young woman waiting on us to give it to the first customer who came after we left.

And here is the truth. It was the absolute best caramel peanut butter cookie dough ice cream I have EVER had.

Not Quite Flowers for a Stranger

Today is the 27th of the month which is of course, Give Flowers to a Stranger Day. ( For those of you who don't know, Give Flowers To a Stranger Day happens on the 27^th of every month. For more in depth history of this very special holiday, take a look at "It's That Time Again...Flower's for a Stranger." ) I must admit, celebrating H on GFTSD started as somewhat of a challenge.  A quick internet search of flowers that begin with H revealed a long list of names I did not recognize or could not pronounce.  There were  a couple I thought about, hibiscus and hydrangea.  Both beautiful and both a bit hard to come by this time of the season. 

The one that stood out for me was hostas.  I don't  usually think of this as a flower, more of  a shade plant that throws a few stems of flowers later in summer.  But then I realized that the hostas were actually the perfect plant for this day.

When we moved to this home over 10 years ago, my mom brought us many buckets of perennials from her yard, including a few different kinds of hostas. Not knowing anything about landscaping or what kind of flowers should go where, I threw them into one area of my yard and forgot about them.  By last year they had multiplied into many disorganized clumps, clearly with the potential to beautify my yard, but in need of some guidance to do so.  Along came two of my oldest friends to spend the day with me digging, dividing and planting.  And this spring I have an amazing shade garden with an assortment of hostas that are placed just right.  When I look I see  not only the perfectly placed plants, but the kindness and friendship they represent.  I love seeing part of my mom's garden in my yard and I love that my friends helped create it.

Today I dug up a few of those perfectly placed hostas to give to my friends who help me.  Not quite flowers for a stranger, but it seemed right nonetheless.

Helpin' and Hollerin' in the Neighborhood

Hello to our new and faithful followers of the ABCs of Kindness.

This is the week of H.

Last night as I returned home from work at a relatively late hour, I saw my neighbor was getting out of her car.  She said, "Hi Kim" before I got my evening greeting out of my mouth.  I said a hearty "hello" back and then quickly hollered out, "Hey, I was wondering... when your grass gets to be like it is now, with all our rain etc, would you like me to cut it?  I really do like mowing the lawn!"  By now we'd met in the puddle filled street.  She was petting Rowdy. (You followers now know him.  For those of you who don't, check out www.abcofkindness.blogspot.com Engage and Express entry)  She smiled and said, "Absolutely and I'll make a trade with you for something else."  I said, "No no, really I'd like to do it but did not want to mow if you had bigger plans, like baling hay or something."  We laughed, chatted a bit more about stuff and headed our separate ways.

This morning when I awoke I saw the weather was clear enough (we've had tons of rain).  As I left for the morning walk with the dog I planned to return and mow that lawn.  It would take all of 15 minutes.  I was excited to help out and be outside before heading to work.  As the 30 minute walk came to an end I rounded the corner and to my great dismay a landscaping pair was packing up their mowers and rakes after having completed "my" job.  I was very sad to not be able to help.  It was the topic of today's blog.  It was all planned out.

Then I chuckled to myself and thought, "See, that just goes to show that one can not predict the future...gotta go with the flow."  I do not believe my neighbor knew that the guys were coming by to mow.  They don't always work on their yard.  Her husband must have known his limitations with time etc. and took care of lining up the guys to help out.  I certainly don't know but I can imagine that as a possibility.  Also, neither my neighbor nor I knew last night that I was contemplating mowing today and that the mowing might be woven into this blog.

So for the blog I was left thinking... How do I help out my neighbors?  What acts of kindness do I extend in the hood?  And what can I continue to do?  Friendly Hellos, like the one last night and the one with another neighbor and his little dog this morning;  bringing in the trash cans and recycle bins from the road for the next door neighbors;  hanging with the 5 year old from next door and letting her pick flowers from the garden.  All of these acts have taken place this week.  I just did not get to mow that lawn!

I plan to keep hollerin' out and helpin' when I can, in the neighborhood.

Gift Giving

This week of G's in the ABC's of Kindness has lead me to really think about Gift Giving.  I've always loved giving gifts.  So, I looked up the word "gift" on dictionary.com.  Here is what I found.

"something given  voluntarily without payment in return, as to show favor toward someone, honor an occasion, or make a gesture of assistance; present.

the act of giving.

something bestowed or acquired without any particular effort by the recipient or without its being earned: Those extra points he got in the game were a total gift.

a special ability or capacity; natural endowment; talent: the gift of saying the right thing at the right time."

It's an easy word to define, among words, yet the act of giving and/or receiving a gift is not always a simple type of act.  I do believe giving or receiving a gift is an act of kindness which can be filled with a certain grace.

This week I thought about, gave and received gifts.  I'll list gifts either given (to someone by me) or received (by me from someone else).  A game of Scrabble, a coffee shop gift card, two bouquets of flowers, coverage for time away from work, words of genuine thanks, words of genuine forgiveness, a shared ride in my car to a meeting away from work, several thoughtful, good phone chats with friends, a butterfly stepping stone around which I built a walkway in my yard, a treat for a dog, a smile, humor, listening ears, the sound of my purring cat, johnny jump ups, grape, strawberry and raspberry honey sticks, loading the dishwasher, compliments on a beautiful garden.  What gifts did you give or receive this week?